Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
