I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
