bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I bet he comes in French.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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