i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
