she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
