from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
