1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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