Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
