I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
