i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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