this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
