My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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