We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
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i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
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My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm like, not good at living.
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