you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize