my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize