The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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