week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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