you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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