what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
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i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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