Kiss
Puke
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I'm passing your future prison.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
