i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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