Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
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I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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