The maid of honor just puked.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
