The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
