i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm at about main and main street
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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