We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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