She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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