Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize