One girl and one boy is just not enough.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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