he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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