I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Randomize
