And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
