operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
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Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
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library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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