It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
