I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you would pick up someone in the library
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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