i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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