Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
