i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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