butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
