Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
