That's intense
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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