Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
