i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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