What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
he was CRYING into my vagina
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize