Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Little spoons don't ask big questions
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
