his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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