I'm going to jail i love you
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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