It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
