my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
