walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
