Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Randomize
